John and I traveled to NY for a weekend of dining, shopping and people watching, while sitting at the sidewalk cafes. We have such a great time relaxing and talking during these weekends. This particular weekend brought us to some interesting conversations with complete strangers.
Just a smile or a hello to a waiter, a woman walking her dog, a manager overseeing his crew, as they hustle in a crowded restaurant, can release confessions, stories of their desires and stories of their love ones.
Several months ago, John and I enjoyed a visit to a pub, featuring brewed beer. It was a late lunch, I was starving. The manager greeted us, the server was busy, and he seated us, while John was asking questions. How long have you been opened? How long have you been managing? How many hours do you work a week? Questions after questions, but he answered, and seemed happy someone was interested. We ordered, enjoyed every bite. The manager was on his cell phone for a few minutes, and after ending the conversation, he came to our table, excited and smiling. “I just spoke with a customer and friend, and she is moving from her apartment and wants me to sublett!!!” “Perfect, it has a small yard for my kids, and only walking distance from the pub.” “its a miracle”. We were excited for him and asked questions about the new apartment, he knew every square inch of the space, just a few legal “things” had to be worked out. We left, having had a wonderful meal and conversation.
Easter weekend, we drove again to NY, it was beautiful bright sunny weekend, we love NY visits, with no real plans, just the usual, looking for parking, hauling luggage from the car and checking out the area. To some it sounds crazy, enjoying all the challenging efforts, just to get settle, but to us, its another adventure! As usual, I am hungry, so off we go in the neighborhood, looking for food. Without a specific location in mind, we were so pleased to find we were only a couple blocks from the pub, that we enjoyed weeks before. This time, they had sidewalk tables, the sun had brought out many people to enjoy the day. People were talking back and forth, laughing, eating, and drinking, wearing sunshades to protect from the glare of the bright sun!! It could not get much better. Except, when Mothers with Easter hats, walking to the Easter Parade with their children and their creative decorated hats. That was a site!
John and I waited for a table outside, and we were so surprised, when the manager, from weeks ago, with menus in his hand, found the perfect table for us. We had our usual, if you can say usual, since this was only the second time we were at the pub. After we consumed our usual, we just sat in the sun and just watched the groups of people walk by. When the lunch crowd left, leaving some open tables, the manager came by and joined us in conversation. Of course, we asked about the apartment. The apartment is still possible, he tells us, but that was not the focus of what was really on his mind. His face was much more strained, between his eyes was that deep frown that we are all familiar, with just a question, his deep thoughts, came brusting out. He shared that he was a single parent, caring for two young children. His ex-wife had become addicted to opioids, and left them for the addiction. While, he was at work, she came to their home and took the kids, and left him searching for them. Private detectives found them in Ct. he was relieved that the kids were ok but so angry, worried about the kids. Weeks have passed and he has not seen the children, hiring attorneys to charge his exwife with kidnapping. After negotiations and cash, she has decide to give him full custody. John and I were loss for words, what do you say?, only words of encouragement, as we all know, their are two sides of the story and we were hearing only one. We both realized, we were his sounding board, knowing that we would not judge but just listen to the story, a story that he could tell to strangers and express his frustrations and we would not share with anyone that he knew. We were safe.
When people talk about their most personal situations with complete strangers, it is an admission that they are vunerable and scared. So many of us, just want someone to listen and be heard. Hopefully, John and I did that for him on a perfect sunny day in NY.
It was time to leave NY for home. Our drive will take a few hours but our plans are to stop if we find anything interesting to see. Within an hour of our departure, we stopped at a reststop, John and I were both sleepy,so we took a blanket from the trunk and spread it under a huge tree, down on our backs watching the breeze blow through the leaves of the trees. It did not take long before our eyes were heavy and we fell into a light sleep.
We both lifted our heads at the same moment, when we heard a dog bark. A small white mixed breed, looking at us along with his owner. A tall woman with running shoes, ball cap, and light jacket. Her name is Mary . “So sorry to wake you” Of course it was ok, ” no problem, we were just resting” . Then the questions began from my dear sweetheart, John. “We are traveling to Western Mass., and you?” Question, question, question… She was traveling to Connecticut, from a visit with her niece. Mary is married, her husband is living in the carribean, year round, which was not her idea of a perfect retirement. She would return to Ct during the spring and summer to visit her neice, she did not have any children, and her niece is very special to her . Her niece’s mother and her sister, was not the best of parents. She had addiction issues and had left her daughter stranded at times. Mary wanted to be there for her niece when she felt overwhelmed and alone. Mary also had a strong need to be with her niece.
Mary had worked 30 years for a manufacturing company in Ct., and was happy she was able to retire with a “pretty good” pension. She and her husband are healthy, and thankful for that. Her husband rarely returns to the United States, he is happy and enjoys his new friends, the new foods, the water and of course,” no snow”. He does not feel the draw to return like Mary. Mary gets bored with the total relaxation that retirement offers, so she comes home as much as possible. I thought to myself, she should not retire. Mary misses her life.
It was getting late and it was time to go. We gathered our blanket and wished Mary a safe trip home.
The last hour of our drive was not eventful, just John and I reviewing the details of the weekend and the fun time we had together just hanging out in NY.. can’t wait to go back…
agranlife's Blog 